Tuesday, April 14, 2009

The Penguins' Deluded View of History

One of my most prized possessions is a VHS from 1989 called "Never Say Die," which goes into really ridiculous detail on the Flyers' 1988-89 season, including a long
segment about what the team did to kill time while in Winnipeg. Really must see stuff.

But since the video is impossible to find and will likely never make it to YouTube, I had to find an alternate source for clips on the Flyers-Penguins first ever playoff meeting, in 1989. And yes, it really did take 21 years for the cross-state Penguins to face the Flyers in the playoffs even though they joined the league in 1967-68, because the Penguins were just horrendous in the first half of their existence. The flightless birds only won three playoff series in their first twenty-one seasons, whereas the Flyers had won three playoff series in a season five times by the time 1989 rolled around. That had to be pretty embarrassing for not just the Penguins and their fans, but everyone in the league.

So in lieu of Never Say Die, I found a clip on the 'Tube from what appears to be the Penguins equivalent of Never Say Die. Except that unlike Never Say Die, this Penguins video, inexplicably titled "There's a Team in the Building," is completely on crack. There's some bold-faced bias that even a Fox News anchor would have to shake his head at.

If you don't pay really close attention to the narration, you'll assume the Penguins won this series, when in reality they lost it to a pretty mediocre Flyers team that wouldn't make the playoffs again for the next five years.

Did you catch any Flyers wins in there? They mentioned the Flyers winning game two while showing a Penguin scoring and fans in the Igloo applauding. The mention of the Flyers winning Game 4 was made while the Penguins were shown celebrating their Game 3 win. Game 6's mention is a sentence fragment. The Flyers win in Game 7 mentions a more complete thought, but tries to diminish the win by saying the Flyers "stole" it. Takes some balls to say that a team "stole" a game they won 4-1.

I do realize that getting mad at the narration of a VHS from 20 years ago might not be the most relevant way to prepare for the playoffs, but I care not. Let's just hope the Penguins' 2009 VHS is equally dismissive of these upcoming four Flyer wins.


Anonymous said...

Know what's sad? Same background music and stock footage used from "Never Say Die."

Salmon said...

It is sad, knowing they probably rolled out these cookie cutter things for every team. Even those ridiculous grunting sound effects they add to hits are the same.

Different narrator, though. Different title, and much more realistic view of what happened.

Never Say Die totally glossed over the entire Montreal series the Flyers lost, it didn't go to such great efforts to blow sunshine up anyone's ass. I'm fine with that decision (though the Chelios attack is worth immortalizing in VHS form.

the_Froin said...

Great post. I get pissed everytime that damn center ice commercial comes on with that Yinzer in California making the boards/glass to sit in front of his TV, just so he can bang on the glass when he's excited.

I see every Pittsburgh fan doing this in between their sibling kissing.

Anonymous said...

Oh, this one's even better. But you can just start at 4:55.

And Tocchet, Kjell Samuelsson...but especially Kenny Wregget would like to thank the Flyers for the only Stanley Cup rings of their careers. Oh, wait.

Wregget = one series where he beat the Pens, or four where he sat on his ass while the Pens won. Wonder which he preferred.